March 2012
103 posts
I wish I was artistic.
I wish I could paint, or draw or sketch, something, something, something.
I think there’s more to it, yes. Of course. The idea, the main, main idea in the artists’ head must be incredible.
I’m sure they hate their work, never really content with the final outcome, something to fix here and there.
But their ideal image is and forever will be a mystery to...
“and now in fact you’re ready to hook up with a real great girl if you can...”
– Dean Moriarty (Jack Kerouac)
1 tag
always| kev brown.
February 2012
72 posts
It amazes me how quick I go from wanting to do something to not wanting to do anything.
I need to be more concrete.
I need to have my emotions in tact.
Here we go again with this fucking bullshit of an attempt to maintain myself and my thoughts.
I’ve been slacking and I’ve been feeling like shit as a result, and I know this.
I know, I know, I know.
I can’t be arrogant...
I don’t get it.
It doesn’t match up.
This makes me happy.
I swear.
Why can’t I accept that.
This feels good, why can’t it sink in like melted butter on bread.
Why, why, why do I feel so plain and blank.
I don’t understand it.
It’s annoying.
Really, really annoying.
happy mess| atmosphere.
Who knows.
I don’t know, do you know?
I wish I could tell you that I fucking love the thought of every thing that could be.
Every single thing, yes, I don’t know why I can’t just enjoy such images and possibilities at ease though.
I’m too stuck on ground, my darling, I cannot simply dream without the grasp of reality and I suppose it does keep me from even imagining.
...
what’s going on| marvin gaye.
going in for life| drake.
I love love.
I become too, too involved in figuring out the general understanding of it.
And it’s only insidious because there… is no general understanding of it.
I even know that myself yet I cannot stop thinking about it.
The simplest form of it appears at a random, like life with it’s events, and I do the best I can to be successful in handling such situation.
I suppose I...
There’s so much to ponder.
There’s so much to think.
You cut off any chance of progression when you’re constantly limiting yourself to one thought.
I suppose you also cut off the chance of destruction, but is the one thought in your mind helping you or hurting you?
Decide that first.
Then make your move.
Time is a ticking.
Don’t force yourself to think the worst of...
I like to take walks.
You will never know who’s to come.
It’s like Christmas, you don’t know what you’re gonna get but you just know you’re going to get something.
So, I just walk and look.
It was a beautiful day today, the sky was blue, beautiful blue. The kind of blue that you can only remember seeing in the best of your childhood blue.
Yeah, that blue.
The...
1 tag
september in the rain| george shearing.
i’ll be around| george shearing.
It wouldn’t mean anything to you if you didn’t see it from my view.
No, no, no.
I couldn’t exaggerate simple bliss, impossible, so I don’t bother to explain.
If you feel like you want to see what I see then ask, that’s all.
I have nothing to hide and so much to offer but I don’t impose. Why speak if no one listens?
We can view the world and you can tell me...
Comprehension is key.
Listen, follow, take it, use it, and remember it.
Improve or destroy yourself.
Your choice.
That’s what interests me.
Everyone knows what they’ve seen and what they’ve felt and what they don’t want to feel and what they truly, truly want to feel.
Regardless if they act accordingly or act completely different than their ideal of themselves.
We...
memory lane| nas.
me and mrs. jones| billy paul.
1 tag
Beautiful day, huh?
As of lately, I haven’t pulled the roots out of the ground, I simply smell the flowers rather than observe them in every way possible.
There’s a point where you have to be content with life being in charge and you aren’t in charge of it.
It could be a day, a month, a year, a fucking lifetime.
It depends on you really.
It’s just difficult for people...
singin’ in the rain| gene kelly.
amnesia| blu.
There has to be passion.
There just has to be.
I would think.
Something out there in the world has to be able to captivate not only your eyes, but your mind and your heart.
Passion, yeah.
But, what if you don’t know what that passion is?
I’m sure not everyone does.
Not everyone is so lucky.
Start simple.
You.
Why not start there?
Let you fall in love with you and then hell,...
The thought behind every word in a book, novel, poem, and everything in between is incredible.
You must be precise, you must keep an even flow even with all these thoughts flying at you.
You must maintain order, structure, and ultimately, patience.
Though your work may not be appreciated at it’s core, the words are universal, they can be perceived any way imaginable.
That means the...
Loveless with another individual, being alone did not bother me.
My own soul did not crave comfort, but my heart, ah, that’s a different story.
I was lost, internally conflicting with everything I thought I knew.
I did not know, but I blindly chose to become apart of something that my heart clung onto.
It did not let go and I enjoyed the mind of the time and let the words lead my...
1 tag
lover man| billie holiday.
“It’s not...
Sometimes you just don’t know what to do.
Simple.
It’s a given, you can’t know everything, that wouldn’t be fun.
There’s always a possibility for mistake, no matter the occasion, but if you go into something with the thought of failure overpowering the thought of success, you’re already at a disadvantage.
This event, situation, or circumstance shall pass as...
I want to travel to every portrait, view, and sight I’ve stared at.
You can see anything, anywhere really.
But, touch, touch is something that doesn’t simply fade.
You cannot breathe the air you were breathing while you were in awe again.
You cannot feel the same wind rub your cheeks and you cannot feel that same sense of appreciation for such beauty in this shit hole of an earth.
...
Listen
moon & stars remix| big k.r.i.t.
Never be unaware.
Always listen and always soak in what’s around you.
You never know when something will catch your eye, you will never know what changes your life.
Just always be aware.
And when whatever it is enters your life, you have to just run with it.
Have fun.
I let things flow and I just capitalize when I think the time is right.
And that’s how I write.
I let the peak of my thoughts determine where I want everything to go.
But it’s hard to lead when you don’t know.
I hate feeling like this, merely dependent on events and if they don’t go my way, I then feel the effects of it.
I anxiously await so it’s non-stop.
I...
didn’t cha know| erykah badu.
Dream now.
Think about it.
Before you paint or before you draw or before you do anything, you have an ideal, you have an image to project to the world.
Only you bear it and it’s on you to create it.
There is nobody and nothing that can draw a future for you.
But you can.
What do you wish to achieve, what do you wish to do?
You let time pass because you say you don’t know, but...
If I could, I would.
I’m sorry for not being able to show you what you want to see.
I see it and believe me, I don’t know why you don’t.
The position I’m in doesn’t allow me to speak.
Only listen.
And that’s okay, I don’t mind.
But opportunities only last for so long.
I always seem to be late.
Or slow.
I don’t know.
there’s gotta be| am kidd ft viddy v.
keep it g| asap rocky.
purple| nas.
welcome back chilly| lupe fiasco.
Life is full of cycles.
Things come and things go.
You are all you have with you.
You are all that is certain.
Invest in yourself, there is no chance of lost profits.
I went to see an old family friend of my grandpa’s today.
He’s in the hospital, real old, around 80 something.
Fragile, soft old man.
But real grumpy, like my grandpa, so it’s fun to be around.
It’s always difficult to see someone strong become so weak.
And it’s worst to know that there’s nothing you can do.
I watched as I gave him his cup to drink his...
Random events happen and hopefully I’ll benefit from them.
I keep my eyes open and ready for new experiences that will enhance me as a person, yet that allows the possibility for things that could destroy me as a person.
It’s life, it’s what happens.
You must not fear the possibility of agony, you must accept the possibility of joy.
If you are willing to learn, you will make...
But like I said, this year is my year buddddy.